This week

Well so far it has been a roller coaster my Job fired me because they said I had to come back and I could not come back yet. She is so unpredictable she has such good days but when she is bad days I want to just cry. I am so scared for her each day because I really question how she is feeling. She has just learned to communicate but all she says is owwie and points all over her body. That makes me think she is in pain every where. I want her to experience a wonderful life I really wonder what kind of quality this will bring her. I worry about my other kids they seem to wonder when I am going to beable to get out of my house and spend the summers like we used to camping, swimming etc. I wonder how much of a permanentl psychological effect this has on her. I know something I am more prayerful and thankful. Thanks for reading.....

Probably the most common question I get is How did you know that something was wrong. Well over the past year it seemed as if she was an average little 2 year old. She was really wild and demanding and really threw endless fits.

I worked for Verizon wireless they have a very strict attendance policy and towards the fall she was always sick. Ear infections, fever, flu, puking it was never ending and I was missing allot of work. I took her in at least a dozen times the doctors said it was always something. Now because I was a single mother with six kids, I was very busy and seemed to run around with everything else and I was at my wits end. Every morning I would go into her room to wake her up and she would fight me about getting out of bed, getting dressed, you name it. It was exhausting i had a really bad morning while attempting to getting her dressed again she fought me. She even would go as far as to injure herself. I thought nothing of it when I saw bruising on her lower half of her legs. I was putting her in her carseat and she proceeded to bang her head and flip it back and forth. I was having a horrific morning and I started to tell her to "stop it right now". To prevent her from further injuring herself I put my 3 fingers on her forehead and said hold still. This is while I was seat belting her ( I was screaming at her really bad) I got her buckled up and dropped her off at the sitter (my mother) I started crying to my mother because I told her "something is mentally wrong with Ashlynn mom, she is not just throwing fits and it is an everyday occurence": She never seemed to be a happy little girl. I then told my mom how I had put my 3 fingers on her forward and looked at my little girl I had put 3 big bruises on her forward from my fingers. My mother said "oh Joanna you would of really had to of hurt her pretty bad to put bruises on her". I felt like crap and I started to feel like I really may of hurt her. My mom said she looks raelly grey and the fact that she bruises so easily, there has got to be something wrong with her blood. My mother said I think she may be anemic. I never thought of it because I see her every day but that would explain why she is so down and does not smile or laugh and play very much. I took her to the doctor and this time I told her my story about how I had bruised her and her legs were bruising very easily. Well after a thorough examination she recommended I go up to Primary Childrens that day and said I should get blood work done on her. I went up to Primary's and that is how we found out that my poor little girl needed 5 blood transfusions and 2 platelet transfusions. I am so sickened that I was so impatient with her and I feel like a terrible mother for not seeing the signs. So yes she is diagnosed with ALL wow how scary is that...Here is her story